For some time now, I’ve been working on my “Listening vs. Hearing” when I’m receiving constructive criticism and advice from someone. This experience in working my ways has given me the eyes to see how Ill-tempered a person can become when you are giving them advice yourself, or just pointing out an aspect in which they could do better with a slight variation of their ways.
Beats me how people can, not only disregard whatever you are saying, but try to cover the fact that they can improve, by either saying: “but you do it too” (if the case applies), or just toss you into oblivion. I would love it if people understood that I’m NOT judging when I bring something to someone’s attention, specially when I tell him/her in a private, one-on-one, and in a kind manner.
Another thing is, I’m expressing my love (or friendship, or appreciation, pick one…) towards that person when I bring those things to his/her attention (and not anyone else). I just want said person to be better; to help. We all need to be mature enough to listen, and humble enough to accept that we need to improve. I’m currently working on polishing those two.
On Luke 6:42, Jesus tells us:
How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
So, while I’m working on fixing my problems, won’t I be able to bring similar issues to the attention of others? And what about the problems I don’t have? A lot of the times the (constructive) criticism and advise will be frowned upon and disregarded.
I guess I need a piece of advice… both on the lines of improving my own listening and my dilemma of others not listening to me.